Sunday, January 16, 2011

Golden Globes off the Blogphase

8:01 SEE PREVIOUS POST FOR WACKY ARRIVALS.

8:03 Ricky Gervais has already decimated The Tourist. Ouch. and even brutalized my Cher. "Why don't you want to see Cher?" Because it's not 1975." Ouch 2. And this wasn't part of the joke BUT when he said "The Walking Dead" they cut to Steve Buscemi. Ouch 3

8:04 My "comedy" in the arrivals was much kinder. Well but for the Silence of the Lambs joke.

Bale wins the night's first award

8:04 I don't know if you read Friday's Towleroad article but I devised a Golden Globe Drinking Game which goes like so.

Drink every time...

  • Someone makes a Black Swan joke.
  • Someone makes a Facebook joke.
  • Cher licks her lips.
  • Every time a presenter arrives that has absolutely no business being there other than as shameful attempt at attracting young viewers who won't be watching anyway. (Justin Beiber et. al)
  • When "Miss Golden Globe" is introduced.
  • Another swig if she's totally awkward about it. Having celebrity parents is SO mortifying!
  • You spot a closeted gay. (Kevin Spacey et. al)
  • Every time there's a closeup reaction shot of someone who clearly did not get Ricky Gervais's joke. (Even if they're laughing)
  • You see two celebrities you'd otherwise never see together sharing a table. (The seating arrangements are so bent sometimes.)
  • A winner is announced. Keeping chugging until they make it to the stage!

GOOD LUCK.

<-- Drinking Opportunity. Captain American with... The Fighter?

8:14  BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR - CHRISTIAN BALE. The speech is great and I loved that he singled out Mark Wahlberg's work and mentioned that the stoic character never reaps the benefits.

8:16 Katey Sagal wins BEST ACTRESS IN DRAMA SERIES for "Sons of Anarchy" but we were ordering pizza so I missed her speech.

8:17 Miss Golden Globe already? "Gia Mantegna". She was not awkward about it at all so you only get one drink not two. Don't be greedy about it. You'll be drunk in no time even if you're VERY strict about the roles.

8:22 Ricky Gervais just introduced Bruce Willis as "Ashton Kutcher's Dad." HEE. But then Bruce made the evening more absurd by saying the word "fabulous". I somehow didn't expect that word out of Bruce's mouth.

8:25 BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR TV - CHRIS COLFER "GLEE"Oh he's so shook up. And he's way back there, table-wise. Beautiful speech.

I think I dropped my heart between Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore so if anyone sees that please return it to me.

You know every gayboy in the world would love to say that line. It's "fabulous" as... uh... Bruce Willis might say.

8:30 UHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhh

8:31 I don't even know what to say. They bring La Pfeiffer out to present and she is the one who gets the "honor" of introducing Tim Burton's Eyesore in Wonderland. 

Let this be a lesson to us all: BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR.

8:34 BEST ACTOR IN A TV DRAM - STEVE BUSCEMI BOARDWALK EMPIRE AND BEST SERIES DRAMA BOARDWALK EMPIREThe Globes do love the new series. SHINY NEW TOYS. I think we can all agree though that Michael C Hall is the winner for Most Two-Toned Hair. Red beard, brunette hair. Curious. "It's saying please wrap up already?" Be careful Buscemi. If they drown out Christian Bale, they won't be kinder to you.

8:42 Awards Season Giveth (Good Films Winning Stuff) and Taketh Away (Pfeiffer introducing Eyesore). And giveth again. Behold the cutest thing you'll see all night.

And as Julia reminds us in the comments. STARS. THEY'RE JUST LIKE US.

8:45 Ricky Gervais makes a funny about Jenny From the Block being "that block between Cartier & Prada"BEST SONG GOES TO... "YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE LAST OF ME" Why is there no reaction shot of CHER? Christina Aguilera's face looks curiously "full" tonight. Like Portman full but outside she was talking about not having another kid for awhile. BEST SCORE GOES TO... "Trent Rezor & Atticus Ross The Social Network'  Nine Inch Nails in a tux?! I'm so weirded out but so happy.

8:50 COMMERCIAL and PIZZA arrival. Brilliantly timed. How is your evening going?

8:54 Oh confusion. Pizza did not arrive. False alarm.

 

 

 


Great classic films, best all time movies

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