Craig here, taking a look at Renée Zellweger's new cinema release. (There are a few mild spoilers contained)Case 39 stars Zeéeeee as Emily Jenkins, a concerned social worker in a headband. Sheâs worried about the well being of a child. Weâre more worried about her personal hair-care regime: When her hair is up, fixed in place with said headband, sheâs out of danger, hair down means terror is likely afoot. Her life depends on the precarious positioning of her follicles. Make a note of the subtle differentiation as it will help guide you through the many twisty plot derivations of Christian Alvartâs new (though actually old*) horror-thriller.Headbanded Emily Jenkins gets the titular case plopped on her desk, so she duly investigates a couple who she suspects have been mistreating their 10-year-old daughter Lill! ith (Jodelle Ferland). She scrambles to the couple's creepy house along with boss Ian McShane (growling an otherworldly accent as yet unidentified by literature or science), just as the parents are about to roast liâl Lill in the oven -- seriously, this scene is hilarious. Zellweger and McShane lay waste to moody-mom and bad-dadâs furniture and faces whilst rescuing the half-baked moppet. (McShane, trying out too-late for a role in The Expendables, literally dropkicks the mother into a table and indents a fridge with the fatherâs head - and McShaneâs about 110 years-old! The Oscar for Best Supporting Sexagenarian Shit-Fit is his for the taking).Be honest, does my hair look good like this?Soppy ol' Emily, ditching the headband, gets to adopt Lillith and live happily... never after? âCause, ah, you see, maybe thereâs more to case! 39 than our Zeéeeee bargained on (as weâve only sat throug! h half o f the film's 109 minutes). Is Lillith actually as sweet and innocent as everybody initially thought? Could she be the devil with a dollhouse? If you havenât guessed whatâs happening by this point then you havenât been paying attention to the headband theory. (Hair up = phew, safe; hair down = argh, get that spawn of Beelzebub off my property, post haste!)Renée keeps the family dinner warm in Case 39Emily soon forgets about cases 1 through 38 (all other kids in peril can obviously go take a jump) to do everything in her power to Get To The Bottom Of All This. There are a handful of amusing scenes along the way, and more than a few howlers peppering the plot; a fun so-bad-it's-good timeâs almost to be had. If you're willing, try a few pre-movie drinks. One scene where Lillith asks a headbanded Zeéeeee if she could brush her hair had! me shouting, 'Yes! For the love of God, yes! Take that headband away and brush her hair!' Bradley Copper responds to Renée putting the Chicago soundtrack on. and other captions.Thereâs a naked Bradley Cooper as Zeéeeee's beefcake beau, who has his bath time royally ruined by a particularly pressing wasp problem; he then buzzes off halfway into the film (the script for The Hangover must have arrived.) Although the scene where Ferland is interviewed by Cooper, and acts him and anyone else (in this scene and others) right off the screen, is genuinely creepy. Renée just puts on a tight face and stands by looking awkward. In a headband. Renée is driven to dispair by her missing headband.The editin! g may have been carried out by a drunken Edward Scissorhands, ! and the pace is defined by accident rather than design. Case 39 is more eventful than Joshua, but doesnât have the daft-but-nifty twist or fun factor of Orphan - two other recent Is My Kid Satan's Spawn? genre entries. Itâs so close to being a new trash gem, but, despite a grab-bag of chucklesome moments early on, it wimps out at the last minute with a wet whimper. Near the end Renée says, âYou know, none of this should ever have happened!â Oh Zells Bells - you took the words right out of my mouth. *The film was completed in 2006 but has only now seen the light of day, after an ever-shifting release date pattern that took in fifteen date changes over three countries. Case 39 is in theaters now.
Great classic films, best all time movies
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment